If you could tell the world anything today, what would you say?
I still find freedom of expression a tricky one. Writing for me satisfies the river of words, feelings, emotions that build up inside me that just wants OUT. I have many dams in place under the names of fear, worry, overthinking (will people like what I write, will they care, will this make me sound x,y,z,). Rather than just writing for the sheer joy of it. Expression can always bring potential of trouble and there really is a point where we just need to get over it.
I’m quite taken in by reminding myself of Occam’s razor lately. The simplest explanation being the most likely. What are we killing ourselves and our minds for? I love helping people. I am pretty anti-social but I do love people. The last few days I’ve just bounded along in life and not really put a massive amount of effort into anything. Probably about 57% of my usual efforts. I’ve discovered to my shock that I’ve provided more help to others than I have in times when I’ve given 95%. 5% retained for personal sanity. At the core of all this, what is the consistent factor? I’ve been myself with no barriers. I’ll adjust that and add that I’ve been myself in the middle of some meditation work with the earth. I’ll tell you my secret.
This weekend I’ve been working with a patch of woodland. I say
working with, building a relationship with. I found this patch, mossy with some trees. Enough space to have a little sleep or a sit. For two days I pinged back and forth to this space. Each time I got to know the route a little better. Turn left at the ferny plant, up the extra mossy rock, use the thinner tree to swing upwards. Each time I grew more confident in myself. On the first route I was nervously looking around, wondering who would see me meditating in this space and what they could possibly think. Getting sucked in the more spongy earth and generally looking like a new deer. On the last route I was banging my drum and strutting about the moss, not giving a fuck. I became rested, comfortable and accepted by this special space.
Connecting to the earth, sitting, meditating outside and just being me, was very peaceful. When I then returned to the world and to civilisation, I felt like I was bringing all of me. The layers had been forgotten for a while. I was just there to help, just as my soul loves to do. The simplest route to that, was to just be me. Quiet, listening, absorbing, understanding. Give some love and then smile as you know inside that the other person will be just fine, being exactly who they are. Clarity.
I really have no idea as to the point of this post. I feel at peace and attribute this to a few factors, one of which was my repeated connection to this special space in a woodland. I’m talking five times a day, for two days. I guess what I want to say is, go to the woods. Just not my woods. I don’t want to amble up there one day to find someone else sitting in my special place. Find your own woods. . . and go within. A lot. Be You.